I’ve lost track of the number of times I’ve been proposed to. I am a jaded sophisticated 20 something millenial.
No, not really. People just throw out wedding proposals like it’s an instant level up card in a video game.
Yesterday, I was in traffic when a VW Jetta pulled up next to me. It was an annoying man-child from a few years back. All I remember was finding him insufferable at the time. Unfortunately, I find a lot of guys insufferable because there are a lot of guys like this.
His line of attack:
“I still really like you. I wanted to marry you”
We hadn’t even gone out. I couldn’t remember anything about what made this guy memorable or what I did to get rid of him. Thankfully, he obliged:
“At the time you didn’t have time for me. You said I didn’t know you and I couldn’t have feelings for you because of that.”
“So, what’s changed between then and now?”
“I still have feelings for you. I still want to marry you. Nothing’s changed, it’s just a feeling I have. I can’t explain it”
“Ok. So nothing has changed, you still don’t know me and my position has not changed. So…?”
“I believe in fate. I never thought I’d see you again. And I think we’ve grown and matured to give each other time now.”
“Dude, traffic is moving. I’ll see you around.”
There is a special kind of stupid in this world, and it tends to breeds.